Anatomy of a Boundary

The boundary is the marker where I can no longer be myself.

No longer congruent with or authentic to who I am.

When I am about to lose myself... that's the boundary point.

And yet time and again we miss it... the disconnection from self... that amplifies the way my attention pulls toward you as if my nervous system is being dragged by a magnet.

I have been lost and we are bound... I need to find the rhythm of who I am without you while with you still.

The vital re-calibration back to me knowing where I end and you begin..... my body and my mind rest restore and regulate best when I am alone and not satisfying someone else’s needs.

Slowing down now I allow myself the rest I have been depriving myself of by over-giving and being on high alert.

Time to liberate me instead of rescuing everyone else only I can restore my resources.

No longer willing to do whatever it takes when whatever it takes comes at such a high cost to me.

No longer allowing an old commitment to people-pleasing external validation and approval to override my commitment to my own truth and authenticity.

The patterns we're running won't dissolve by someone making a change.

My boundary is mine to honor.

We think our withholds will keep us safe but revealing is what allows connection and healing.